Rat-poison congee racks hospital

Blasphemy! I told them arsenic! Breakfast laced with rat poision - breakfast of champions!

Leave it to the shortest people in the world to harbor one of the tallest. Today, the tallest man in the world (7 feet 9 inches) was married in ASIA. Now I see why they made Godzilla the movie before the West did.

I wonder, 'How much chinee food it take fill up Xiao (pronounced JOW) Ping's shoe?" Lots ee lots of moo goo that's for sure.

Smuggling CROCS, what THE...

Nooo, not those crocs! (If the incident had been in Asia I'm sure they'd stuff their girdle with counterfeit Crocs and sell fo five dolla!) These crocs.... That's right folks, a woman entering Gaza was stopped in the airport and searched because of her "odd shape." The police removed her GIRDLE to find 3 BABY CROCODILES she was trying to smuggle into the city to sell. Oh yea, and when the crocodiles fell from her girdle they created a hoop-lah in the rest of the airport, every fleed the building, ran screaming bloody murder. Lady with crocodile say "she not know they in girdle." Sound the alarm, that sounds like an ______________! Better luck next time lady, maybe stick with what your people know how to smuggle: opium.
For the full story, Click here.

The Asian Squat - A How To Guide

what THE

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=j80YDDfiaT4

asian tourists

Heed my advice. Whenever you see asian tourists, put on sunglasses.

As I walked back from getting lunch this afternoon, I encountered a large group of asian tourists, fresh from the Hong, scuttling about the front of Betsy Ross' house. They seemed to forming a group of some sorts, so I continued to hurridly walk by. Suddenly I hear picha picha and BOOM. All their cameras went off at once causing a shotgun of reverberating light up and down the road. I fell blinded to the ground cluching my bag as my soup went rolling into the roadway.

Please think of the "grizwald christmas" movie when they turn on the lights and the neighbors can't see. That was me this afternoon on second street.

RECALL: Tracker

As I drove down Broad Street today a car is stopped on a hill apparently due to the other car, I blow my horn profusely as the car finally moves into the other lane. I am then confronted with a 1995 Tracker bucking like a horse nearly clipping my vehicle in the process. Figures, it was a car full of ASIANS.

OVERHEARD IN Georgia

A conversation overhead... somewhere in Georgia.

Person A: Why are there black people here? Since when do they study?
Person B: Oh my god, they must be planning petty thefts. Watch your belongings!
Person A: I feel like we are on minority row over here.
Person B: Its because they all live in the projects and the gun shots are not conducive to studying
Person A: God, now here comes the indians
Person B: Immigrants. Is the library being used as the new ellis island?
Person A: This whole place smells like fried chicken, wonton soup, and pooja
Person B: Are the trash cans over flowing with empty KFC buckets?
Person A: No, there is however a stack of DOMINOS BOXES

People are disgusting.